Things I learned tonight:

1. If you go to a bar dressed as a firefighter, a good dance move is to pretend you're spraying everyone with  a hose while occasionally directing the middle finger to the ceiling.

2. You can pretend like you belong at all the parties by showing up, but people will still make fun of you if you're skanky enough to try picking up a homosexual of the opposite gender.

3. Just because you "dressed-up" by wearing a black T-shirt and black hat, doesn't mean you can stalk the cute 18 year old.  She's smart enough to avoid you.

4. Flailing around and bouncing chaotically is chic enough to fit in with hipsters.

5. It's 2008, but some clubs still think Rave music is a good theme for Friday nights.

6. My boyfriend can let loose every now and again.